Me: Ummmmm, yes.
(I guess that one is a compliment?)
Old Lady on the Plane (as I am walking down the aisle): Someone is having a baby!
Me: (awkward smile)
Old Lady on the Plane: So how much longer?
Me: About ten weeks.
Old Lady of the Plane: Oh, wow! Well let's hope you don't have it on the plane!
Me: Uh, yeah.
Eric: Did you have to buy two seats on the airplane?
Me: What?
Eric: You know, because you are bigger now, and they make bigger people buy two seats.
Me: . . .
Eric: I mean, you are bigger.
Me: . . .
Eric: . . . but only temporarily.
Me: Eric, I'm pretty sure you still weigh more than me.
Eric: Oh, no. I don't think so.
Eric's Fiancee: I am seriously rethinking marrying him.
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